Armed with the right tools, you can develop the confidence to ask prospects for a gift beyond their expectations, says Giles Pegram

Over eight years, the ground-breaking Full Stop Appeal secured 42 £1m-plus gifts. I talked to many of those who had given and asked them how it felt when they said “yes”, and every single one said it was an extraordinary moment – something at the very top of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. At their stage of life, they had all the trappings they wanted, had maybe raised a family, and now they felt they needed to do something that would make a real difference to the world after they have gone.

In the USA, asking for major gifts is commonplace and fundraisers do not feel daunted by the task. Across the pond, so-called ‘stretch gifts’ (donations seemingly out of proportion to the givers’ resources, and significantly more than they were expecting to give) are becoming more and more frequent.

The British, on the other hand, do not like talking about money. Fundraisers here are often nervous about asking for a big gift, and this is the biggest barrier to action. The key is preparation. If it’s done well, you will feel much more confident, and you can engage and cultivate prospects to a point where they may give ten times what they were originally thinking.

Let’s talk

The first thing you need to do is sit down with your major donor team and work out your prospect’s propensity to give. Discussing major gifts with the whole team will be a good learning experience for all concerned, and its also important to have more than one mind thinking about the propensity to give.

It is important to distinguish between ‘propensity’ and ‘capacity’. A large number of people in The Sunday Times Rich List have a high capacity, but their wealth is tied up in land and they would find it difficult to simply write a cheque for £100,000.

A donor’s propensity to give will be identified through factors that go beyond looking just at their capacity. You should also be taking into account previous gifts they have given to your organisation or others, and the extent of the donor’s connection with and commitment to your cause. This information can be gathered through a combination of desk research and engagement with the donor.

Stretch it out

If the case for support is strong enough (and it ought to be) then you should be asking for a stretch gift. This is another area where a team discussion can help you get to the right sum. One million pounds is a stretch gift for anyone. For some people £100k might be more appropriate, but the principle remains the same.

You will need to decide in advance whether you are going to ask the prospect for a one-off cash gift, or one that spans a five- or even ten-year period. If made over ten years, even a relatively small sum each month can achieve an enormous outcome. Work out the maths for them – you’ll need to have all the figures to hand when making the ask. If the gift is for £1m, factor in Gift Aid and, depending the length of time over which you are asking them to give, break the £1m down into how much that translates to per month.

Position the proposition

Propensity to give will also depend on the nature of the proposition. An ask by a staff member is not as good as an ask made by a volunteer on a development committee, which in turn is not as good as an appeal for an aspirational project.

Remember that people are giving to the cause, not the organisation. When the donor is on their deathbed, they do not want to think of having given £1m to NSPCC: they want to think that they have stopped children dying from abuse.

So you can’t ask a prospect to give to the general fund, it has to be for a specific project that they have indicated they are interested in.

All about the ask

When you’re ready to move onto the ask, remember that location is important. The ask should not be made at an event; you should always book a specific meeting with the donor, in an environment they feel comfortable in, such as their home or office, and ideally with their partner present (most decisions to give large sums of money are made with the partner). The major donor manager should attend, as should any volunteer involved in the solicitation and, if appropriate, the chief executive too.

It’s vital that the meeting stays focused on the ask. When you arrive at the prospect’s home, after the usual introductions and politesse, you (or the volunteer or chief executive if they are good at asking) should lean forward and say “Can we get on to the reason we asked for this meeting?” Then, five minutes after you have walked through the door, and without too much chatter that will clutter the meeting, you can move on to say something like:

“You have seen our work and got to know us. On the basis of all you have told us, we believe the time is right for you to do something extraordinary [to help the beneficiaries]. We are asking you to consider making a pledge of £1m, over five years, which will [say what the money will be spent on] and almost certainly [say what the outcome/impact of the gift will be].

Then leave it at that. Do not try to embellish what you have said; let the prospect consider it. The only person who should break the silence is the prospect. This is key; otherwise you will be diverted on to other topics, and you want this meeting to be wholly about the ask.

Mind your language

Note that the organisation is not mentioned in the script above – this is deliberate. This is about the cause and the beneficiaries. You are asking them to do something specific, not to give to the organisation. Neither is it really ‘you’ who is asking: it is the beneficiaries.

In the script, the word “extraordinary” is important. It should be stressed, and there should be a short pause afterwards. How many times in your life do you have an opportunity to do something extraordinary? You are really raising the bar. But when you then say that you are asking them to “consider” you take the temperature down by making it clear that you are not going to ask them to make a decision on the spot.

The most likely next step is that the prospect will say that they need to think about it, because it is more than they were considering. You have asked for something extraordinary: the prospect’s mind is whirring.

Now is not the time for small talk. As soon as it is polite, and you have answered any questions that the prospect might have, you should ask for a further meeting in two weeks’ time to discuss their reaction, and then leave. The prospect and their partner have a lot to think about.

What next?

There are a number of possible outcomes of your meeting.

• The prospect calls to decline the close meeting – this is not good news. Try to book another close meeting, but you are probably not going to get the sum you asked for.
• The prospect wants to negotiate: a great deal of tact is required if they do this. If they really have the propensity to give, you should hold out for your original figure. If there is any doubt about their propensity to give, you should be prepared to negotiate, either over the total sum or the period over which the gift is given. But remember, they would not have come through the engagement process with you unless they were expecting to be asked for a gift, so the factyou have made a significant ask shouldn’t come as a surprise.
• The prospect accepts the close meeting.

The latter scenario means you have almost certainly succeeded. In this instance, you should take along the appeal’s chair, or chair of the trustee board, and the volunteer or fundraiser who is directly involved in the ask. When the prospect says yes, you need to break into party mode – pop the corks, open the party poppers. Not literally, but there should be a lightly chaotic moment when all the people from your charity are saying “thank you”, “well done”, “I’m so pleased”, “gosh, that’s fantastic” and so on. Right up until the moment the donor says yes, they will have been in doubt: you need to confirm that their decision was the right one.

At some point in this meeting, you need to ask whether the prospect wants to put their decision in writing, or whether they would prefer the organisation to write to them to confirm it. Either way, there must definitely be a letter immediately after the close summing up what has been decided. Stay as long as you feel welcome, and leave the moment the euphoria has ended. If you really have secured a stretch gift, the donor will wish to reflect on what they have done and be proud of the moment.

One step nearer

Not all of your asks will say yes. There is a rule that for every eight prospects, you will engage four, and get one gift. Prepare yourself for the possibility of the prospect saying no, and don’t be disheartened: remember, a no simply takes you one step closer to the successful ask.

Giles Pegram CBE is an independent fundraising consultant and former appeals director at NSPCC

This article first appeared in The Fundraiser magazine, Issue 17, May 2012