How can we gain greater confidence in talking to supporters about legacies? By challenging our own internal dialogue about them, say Claire Routley and Lesley Howells
One of the reasons some fundraisers struggle to talk to supporters about legacy giving is because of its associations with death. Death is still a taboo within our culture – and its status as a taboo can mean that we find it very hard to talk about it. Just think about the number of euphemisms we employ to avoid even saying the word: kicking the bucket, pushing up daisies, passed away, gone to the other side…
At Maggie’s, a charity offering free practical, emotional and social support to people with cancer and their family and friends, we work with people with life-threatening illnesses on a daily basis, so talking about end-of-life issues is something we do regularly.
We realised that this expertise could be shared with colleagues to help them feel more comfortable with having legacy conversations.
Resetting the internal dialogue
We’ve learned that one of the key barriers fundraisers have in talking about legacies can be their own internal dialogue. The death-related nature of the subject means that we tell ourselves we can’t possibly talk about the subject without frightening people, upsetting them or turning them off from supporting our cause.
To have good legacy conversations, we first need to reset that internal dialogue, and start to understand that by offering supporters the chance to leave a legacy, we’re giving them a wonderful opportunity.
We all have a deeply held need to leave something behind us. And studies show that feeling that one has no one to leave a legacy to can lead to feelings of sadness or even despair. We can leave a legacy – in its broadest sense – in a number of ways, from having children, to planting a tree, to writing a poem.
For many people, however, charitable giving is an ideal way to leave a legacy; it enables them to pass on their values, make a difference to those that they care about, and continue to have an impact after their deaths. Internalising the idea of legacy as an opportunity is one way to reset your internal narrative.
A useful exercise for fundraisers to try
In order to embed this way of thinking, try this exercise which we introduced at Maggie’s, ideally with other members of your fundraising team. Try putting yourself in the shoes of someone you know well; imagine you are that person, and think about your values, what gives you a sense of meaning and what leaving a charitable legacy might offer you in particular.
Then, reflect on the exercise as a team: how did it make you feel about legacy giving? Once you start to feel comfortable with the core idea of talking about legacy giving, you can help yourself to feel more confident by planning out how, specifically, you might raise the subject with supporters; what phrases you might use and how to approach the ask.
By reframing the legacy gift in your own mind as a wonderful opportunity to leave something of yourself behind, and ensuring that you feel confident and comfortable in your choice of phrase, you can help yourself to quieten the negative internal dialogue – and free yourself to offer more people the opportunity to live on through their favourite causes, long into the future.
Dr Claire Routley is a fundraising consultant and founder of Legacy Fundraising Ltd and Lesley Howells is centre head and consultant clinical psychologist at Maggie’s.
